Do Not Accept Anything From Strangers!

Didn’t my parent’s tell me not to accept things from strangers…rides, food, drinks, candy, etc.  Well, yesterday I seemed to have let this age-old advice slip to the way-side.  I was riding my bike in the heat of the day.  I had already drank all of the water that I had brought with me and still had about 2 miles to go.  I really thought I was going to faint.  At this point I was walking along side my bike.  I come to this house where this man had just pulled into his drive.  He gets out of his car and asks if I would like a bottle of water; warning *red flag*…but before I can even process the dangers, I hear myself say, “Yes, please.”  What??? Really?  Okay, so he goes into his house to get it, I just wait like a lost puppy.  He comes out with the glowing, sparkling bottle of greatness.  I immediately start to drink it.  He points across the road to a bench and mentions that I should have a seat over there and take a rest.  SHIT.  Stop drinking the water.  This water must be drugged.  He wants me to go over there so he can keep an eye on me and wait for the drugs to kick in.  At this point I should have just poured the water over my head, while screaming, “AH, YOU CAN’T DRUG ME!!”.  I just thanked him for the water and carried on my way.  You might be wondering did I keep the water; I did.  Why?  Because it was fucking HOT out.  It was either be drugged or die of heat exhaustion.  I drank very little though.

I made it to my appointment with “A”.  When she greeted me, I sat down and immediately let her know the situation. “Hi, just so you know I accepted this bottle from a stranger.  It might have drugs in it.  If I start acting funny, weird, or go into any sort of fit then you can say for sure that there are drugs in it.”  “A” said, “well, was the bottle sealed?” “You know, I can’t remember, I was just too damn thirsty.”  “Okay, I will keep an eye on you.”  I made it through the entire bottle of water without an incident, luckily, it was not drugged and there just happened to have been a kind citizen looking out for my well-being.  Imagine that.

Later in the day.  A friend and I are sitting on some steps by the smoke-shack so I can partake in my filthy cigarette habit.  An older gentleman comes up to me and asks for a light.  Sure no problem.  I help him out and he goes away.  Not to long thereafter he returns with a cigarette in a box and says it is for me.  FREE cigarette…SCORE!!! Of course I take it.  My friend kindly points out that this is the second time today that someone might be drugging me.  Crap.  I keep to smoke the cigarette later at my house, away from everyone, you never know.  These older people have access to the “good” stuff.  Final report:  nothing, no drugs.

This just goes to show how dangerous it is taking anything from strangers.  You never know what they have going on in their deviant minds.  Bastards!

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2 Responses to Do Not Accept Anything From Strangers!

  1. Porkchop says:

    You are hilarious. And wise, so wise.

"Say what you need to say, say what you need to say..."

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